377 days, Blog #121 gratitude vs. privilege
So I’m not really all that impressed by my lame attempt at a
blog last night. My heart wasn’t in the
gratitude thing, so expressing it wasn’t easy for me. Which is why, obviously, I resorted to a lame
word cloud.
I try not to reserve my expressions of gratitude to the
fourth Thursday of November. Or
November. If I stumble upon a moment or
a day that is worth relishing, I will post it on Facebook then. Not that I begrudge the practice of doing it
in November. It is kind of fun to read…
and certainly a nice change of pace from the more regular social network
trivialities.
But then it stops all of a sudden on December 1st. Or today (Black Friday) when all of a sudden
all that gratitude isn’t good enough because we have to rush to the stores
before the sun rises to acquire one more thing to give real value to those
worthwhile moments. I suppose there is a
nice way of looking at shopping like a mad person. Maybe there is a tradition in consumerism
that makes some people happy to be in the moment. Of course there is. I just don’t see how my reality can make the
two coexist.
Anyway, that informs some of my cynicism this year. It does every year and doesn’t normally place
a huge chip on my shoulder so I can’t drink in the happy brief moments of
celebration. The thing that did it this
year was the conversation that erupted earlier this week as a fallout of
Ferguson.
I wrote earlier of how I didn’t react right away to the
verdict. Or the riots. I tried to keep a cool enough distance in
talking about it so that I could keep a cool head. But, slowly, bit by bit, as I read through
comments and stories and more stories, my heart was breaking.
I have let the news item of this week weigh heavily on me… and
so it changes the filter through which I view even the most mundane details of
the week. Even the notion of gratitude.
What is the difference between expressing gratitude and
acknowledging privilege?
I think the urge to ‘check your privilege’ has gotten thrown
into a lot of obnoxious context. Mostly,
I think, by people who feel defensive when asked to cast aside their problems
to verify the greater depth of another person’s problems. But it really isn’t a question of denying
that everyone has challenges that stand in the way of happiness… it is more
like that 30 days of gratitude philosophy… how are you lucky? And in recognizing how you are lucky, is it
not possible to see in greater focus those who are not lucky in the same way?
At least, that’s how I see gratitude.
But… I’m sure people would argue… being white is not
something to feel lucky about. No,
certainly not when being born white is also being born working class. That’s different. No one is going to write in their Facebook
status that “I am grateful for being born white.”
That would be awkward.
But isn’t it also… kind of awkward or obnoxious sometimes to
constantly write in one’s status how good I’ve got it? And so what if my declaration makes someone
else on Facebook feel uncomfortable because life has denied them the privilege
of that joy? Do we even think about
that? Or do we just gracefully go along
with the game? Because it’s November and
it’s cool to express contentment with all that has gone well in life in honor
of a day of turkey feasting?
There are two ways of looking at that, too. At least two.
I don’t expect an answer to this question. I suspect I will continue to ask it for some
time. I will also continue to write of
my delight in the good things in my life.
I just hope that as I recognize them, I will see the fortune I possess
in having them and let it inform me with a desire to give that goodness to
another human being.
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