don't you just wanna curve away

I’ve been thinking outside the box long before that was the popular phrase. Mostly because I don’t like being in a box. I will go out of my way to be original. Even if it is counter-productive.

I don’t trust large groups of people. Strike that. I don’t trust group mentality. It was a brutal lesson I learned at age seven when my peer group turned against me and made me the subject of taunts and teases. Alone, people were my friends. In the crowd of social pressure, they wouldn’t associate with me.

In fifth grade we had a science project on solar heat. We had to construct a model room out of a cardboard box. Most people (or most people’s parents) realized the way to maximize heat on the cardboard box was to cut it at an angle creating the most exposure to the sun. I didn’t pay attention to that logic. I just didn’t want to be like everyone else. Because that, in my mind, was stupid. Following the crowd didn’t prove anything. I got a C. The lowest grade I ever got in elementary school.

It doesn’t always have those consequences. I was my own person in high school. I ended up being second in my class. I left college at the end of my sophomore year. Before the end of the following summer, I got a job at Higgins. I was managing the education department when I left. I went back to college at 25 and landed in London. I’ve veered off the main path many times. Sometimes I get lost… but I often find I end up just where I need to be. On my own.

It doesn’t make it easy for me to play by the rules. Not that I don’t appreciate rules. Some are important. They are about safety and ending hurt. But some rules are just ridiculous. Or outdated. Some rules need reinvention… or eradication. It’s very difficult for me to stay in a straight line. Especially now.